Where To Meet Lesbians

Regardless of whether you’re living in small-town America or the center of gay Paris (literally), there are some romps that universally draw a lesbian crowd or lend themselves to socializing. Yeah, some of them are pretty cliche. But that doesn’t make them any less true. Here are the tops locations in case you are wondering where to meet lesbians.

Your local scene (Bars, Clubs & Groups)

Check your local city paper (or just ask around) to find out the most popular bars, coffee shops, clubs, or gay rights groups in your area. Most cities, however small, do tend to have at least one gay hang out spot, even if it only offers a gay theme night once a week. It might feel cheesy, but if it’s all you got, milk it for what it’s worth. (I certainly did!)

Your local … gayborhood?

Most metro areas tend to have certain neighborhoods with high gay populations, also known as (I’m almost embarrassed to say it) the “gayborhood.” In larger cities, these areas might have specific names, such as the Castro district in San Francisco, or Dupont Circle in Washington, DC. In smaller towns, the area might be just a block or two in a larger neighborhood. Regardless, exploring the gay parts of your city will give you a strong sense of camaraderie and support, and you’re likely to find some pretty cool shops, cafes, and people while you’re at it. If you’re looking for a good place to walk your dog, why not start here?

where to meet lesbians


From rugby to field hockey, and from softball to tennis, there are definitely certain sports that tend to draw a higher number of lesbian players, and it never hurts to get out there and start trying them. Check your local paper for groups in your area. There might even be gay- specific teams set up in your city. Lacking in hand-eye coordination? Who cares. Ask her to be your personal trainer or just watch the games as a supporter. Hell, I would have offered to be a lesbian sports team’s mascot if it allowed me to meet women similar to me!


Everyone needs to get away sometimes and you’d be amazed by how many people you can meet on a gay vacation. Check out: Why Every Lesbian Should Visit San Francisco

Theme Nights

Even if your city doesn’t have 24/7 gay bars and clubs, it has to have gay themed nights. I’ve gone to events ranging from lesbian poetry readings to gay 80s proms, and I’ve met a lot of women in the process. Theme nights are a lot of fun in themselves. From gambling to dancing to art, they keep you entertained. Throw some sexy ladies into the mix and you’d be foolish not to give them a try!

Dog parks

Did you know that 83 percent of lesbians have a pet? Even better, almost 60 percent have dogs.4 That means that at some point or another, they’ve got to get out and walk them, making the local dog park a great place to meet other lesbian women. And, you’ll already have something in common with the women you meet there, besides your mutual love of … women. Bonding over a bull terrier mix? I see fireworks already.

Dinner Parties

I know, I know. The last thing any lesbo wants to do is get stuck at a dinner party with her straight friends and their boyfriends. But nowadays people are coming out of the closet faster than Batman can get to the Batmobile and if there’s one thing we know about all women, they LOVE to set people up. Assuming your dinner party sponsor knows at least one other lesbian, chances are that you will meet at least one other lesbian at the dinner party. The same rule applies to game nights, movie nights, and any other kind of night that can happen at home. Even if you’re not big on the idea of blind dates – especially not in front of curious bystanders – you could make some friends that know where the gay girls are.


We may be lezzies, but that doesn’t mean we’ll sizzle if we come in contact with holy water. If you have a gay-friendly church in your area, you’d be amazed by how many ladies you can meet! Don’t know which churches are gay-friendly? Not a problem. Look for signs that say “open and welcoming” or visit www.gaychurch.org to find gay churches in your area. Just think of all the pretty girls in all their pretty dresses (or handsome men’s clothes depending on their type). Not only do you get to enjoy mass if you’re religious, but you get to look at a gay buffet of women dressed in their finest. Amen to that!

Out and About

This may go without saying, but the best place you can meet other gay women is outside the confines of your home. Everyone has to go grocery shopping, run to the bank, and do all of life’s little chores throughout their day. Similarly, everyone has to get out every now and then, whether it’s a trip to the mall, the movies, or the library. If you just look for some knowing signs of who might be LP (more on that to follow), you might meet your next girlfriend in the process of doing the things you do everyday. Remember, love (and great sex) won’t just come a knockin’. As long as you get out in the world, you’re bound to meet some lesbians that are doing the same exact thing as you.


If you’re too shy to start networking face-to-face, try connecting to other lesbians online via sites like Meetup.com and Craigslist.org. You don’t need to start a relationship on your first encounter. The simple act of starting some friendships with those who have had similar experiences will do you wonders in feeling more comfortable with your sexuality. To learn more about it, check out 5 Reasons Lesbian Online Dating Makes Sense For You.

Gay Papers

Many larger cities publish magazines or newspapers specifically for their gay populations. These include everything from feature and lifestyle stories on local gay leaders to information on upcoming gay rights speaking events, concerts, bars, and more.

If all else fails?

Try Lesbian Attraction Body Mist by Woman to Woman, available on Amazon.com. Kidding. It really does exist, but I don’t recommend it ;)

If you would like extra guidance... I HIGHLY recommend that you grab yourself a copy of The Lesbian Lifestyle Book. It is the only guide you will ever need as a lesbian or bisexual woman.

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  1. Julie says

    Right now with work and school, I don’t really have much free time. While working at my agency, I have developed a big crush on a co worker. Unless she’s reading me like a book, she has no idea I am crushing on her. Aside from giving her papers, when I could put them in her mailbox and at office wide meetings, I never really see her. When I do see her, I always joke around and stuff, but I do that with other staff too. I try to be at least a little flirtatious, but I do it cautiously because she’s the HR person for our agency. To be honest, I’m not sure she is a lesbian, but my gaydar has gone off when I see her. Any suggestions?

    • Allie says

      Be careful, get to know her much better before you try anything too daring. You never know who turns out to be a homophobe these days. Hopefully she’s a nice person and even if she’s straight she won’t act all weird around you after you make a move. Maybe try and find out about her dating history?

  2. Laura says

    One place got completely missed out – work place. Everywhere I worked I met gay women and the bigger workplace the more of them. I have just discovered the 4th lesbian in my work place which for a single girl like me makes going to work something to look forward to!

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